ELECTIONS na FWENDS!!!

sa akung mga AMIGO ug AMIGA dira…ug labi na sa mga miyembro sa akung third party…akong ipa-ila-ila kaninyu ang akung amiga nga mag-contact lens. si….

Angeli Macopia!! Angelie..ANGEL.ANGEL.ANGEL.CONDENSADA!!!..jokess…..by the way….kuan ra ni nako..personal opinion!!!!…ganahan kaayo ko nga si ANGEL! ANGEL! ANGEL! kay mabutang sa student council…

Why???!!……
1. CompSci man ghud siya!!
2. Kay Friends man me..
3. Kay mu-believe phud ko sa iyang mga propaganda…although mu-ingun ang uban nga “Maybe dili mabuhat” but at least ni-aim ang atung CompSci friend nga mapanindut ang atung life sa UP!!<although impossible pa as of now nga manindut atung life sa UP>
4. Ug ang last reason kay..ganahan kaayo ang akung friend nga si James Bayon-on sa iyang mga contact lens…bwhahahaha….
5. Ug ang pinaka-last pa jhud kay…malingaw jhud ko sa tagline sa NKE nga “Sa Pagabarug, ara ang KUSOG!!!”
wala ko nangampanya…kay wala koy company…

but most of all!!!! kabalo jhud kung kinsa ang makadaug(although dili sa elections, i know nga daug gihapun ang THIRD PARTY sa hearts sa akung mga fellow freshie friends!!)

…walay lain kundi ang “THIRD PARTY!!!” weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhh!!!!!!

by the way..wala ko kabalo kung asa ko gikan ani nga picture..

Hotdog Millionaire

Host: Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls and members of the third gender. Welcome to “Who Wants to be a Hotdog Millionaire?!” Our player for today is a 16 year old student from the University of the Philippines-Visayas Cebu College. Help me welcome Mr. Hao Banados

Hao: Hello!!

Host: So, please choose your category from our “Sony Plasma TV”

Hao: Uhmm…I’m gonna be chossing…..

Host: Philosphy! Your category is philosophy.

Hao: But. Hindi pa nga ako nakapili..

_____________________________________________________________

Host: Question no. 1 for 5 pesos.

“For a hedonist (a person whose life is devoted to the pursuit of pleasure and self-gratification) the word GOOD refers to bodily pleasure. For a humanist it refers to the development of all your human potentials. For a logical positivist the word GOOD expresses approval. Alternatively, if you are a Kantian, you will identify GOOD as doing one’s duty.

The question is… “What term in philosophy describes this particular phenomena on which a term has acquired too many uses in numerous language games?”

a. Contingency                        b. Fallacy                    c. Symbolic Logic       d. Ambiguity

FLASHBACK

(mag-linya ang mga si Fatima:Hedonist, Crislyn:Humanist, Isabel: logical positivist)

Hao: What is good?(Kuhitun niya tagsa-tagsa sila Fatima,Crislyn ug Isabel kay nagtalikod man sila.

Fatima: Any action that promotes bodily pleasure is good.

Crislyn: Any action that hastens the development of your intellectual potential is good.

Isabel: Good is for my approval. GOOD!

Hao: Bro! Unsa man jhud na ang GOOD?Nganu lahi-lahi man ni sila ug meaning?

(maabut ang paperplane nga nay “AMBIGUITY” nga word.)

(Back to the GAMESHOW)

Hao: pwede 50:50?

Host: Sure! Why not?

So the choices are.

a. Contin                      b. Fall              c. Symbo        d. Ambi

the words are now in 50:50, so what’s your answer.

Hao: D! Ambi or Ambiguous

Host: Correct! Let’s proceed to the next question.

_____________________________________________________________

Host: Question No. 2 for 10 pesos.

“Some Christians are honest. How many Christians are honest?”

a. Some          b. Difference               c. Product       d. Quotient

Hao: Uhmm..A! Some.

Host: Sure? Why have you chosen some?

Hao: Because the word “some” is so vague which means that the intension of the concept is loose and imprecise.

Host: You sound so intelligent. Because you sound so intelligent, the correct answer is A.

_____________________________________________________________

Host: Question No. 3 for 15 pesos.

“The she-wolf hit the shemale with an umbrella.” Determine whether the sentence is…

a. Vague          b. Clear           c. Ambiguous              d. All of the above.

FLASHBACK

(Naglakaw si Isabel ug Crislyn(shemale))

Fatima: Isabel hit Crislyn with an Umbrella??

Hao: What? Why was Crislyn bringing with her an umbrella.

Hao: NO! what i meant was that Isabel used her umbrella to hit Crislyn.

Fatima: You speak so Ambigous! I was confused with the arrangement and of words.  Be careful and mindul with what you’re saying next time.

(Back to Reality)

Hao: Pwede call a friend?

Host: Sure! Why not?!

Hao: (Nakigtabi sa tindera) Manang! Ayaw diay ug kalimti ug bantay among balay kay wala bayay tawu dira. Palihug na lang phud diay ug pakaun sa baboy. Cge bye.

Host: I thought you were gonna be calling for answer. Oh cge. What’s your final answer?

Hao: C! Ambiguous!

Host: TAMAA!!(Kris Aquino Style)

_____________________________________________________________

Host: Question No. 4 for 20 pesos!

This fallacy is committed when you use a term in one way and then you use it again in a different way in one line of reasoning. What do you call this fallacy?

a. Fallacy of Composition       b. Fallacy of Equivocation

c. Fallacy of Accident             d. Fallacy of Relevance

Hao: Fallacy of Equivocation. Letter b

Host: Sure? Alam mo yan? Let’s see! The correct, right, precise, accurate, exact and factual answer is indeed…………letter B as in bee. Lets proceed to the next question.

_____________________________________________________________

Host: Question number 5 for the amount of _____________________

The question goes like this.

In order to avoid linguistic confusion, you have to define your terms. Of course, the purpose of a definition is to provide information about the correct use of term. There are generally two methods of doing this; either you give a _____ or a ___________ definition.

a. rock and roll

b. all of the below.

c. reportive

d. stipulative

FLASHBACK

Hao: Oh! it’s the championship day for the debate thingy.

Isabel: I go for stipulative definition because it  is a type of definition in which a new or currently-existing term is given a specific meaning for the purposes of argument or discussion in a given context.

Crislyn: Shut Up! Your wrong..I go for reportive definition of a word on which it tells us what others mean when they use a word and what others will understand us to mean when we use the same word.

Fatima: Indeed the debate has already gone very far out of the topic. Remember that our topic is about the morality of abortion and not on its simple meaning. I declare both of you as losers.

(back to reality)

Host: So, do you have an answer?

Hao: Can I ask the help of the audience?

Host: Sure! Why not?! I’ve said this line three times already. So as what you can see on our Sony Plasma TV. Fifty Percent of the audience votes are in letter C while Fifty Percent is on letter D. so what’s your final answer?

Hao: I go for letter A. Rock N Roll.

Host: Sure with that? Okay…I wouldn’t care if you’re sure..the correct answer is…..letter B..sorry you lose…by loser.

_____________________________________________________________

Host: This has been another episode of “Who Wants to be a Hotdog Millionaire?!” Before we say goodbye, I would like to thank Doctors Mannie and Pie Calayan for my skin, Dra Vicky Belo for my lypo. Posh nails for my cute nails. And bench fix for my messy hair. Thank you also to Marithé et François Girbaud for my shoes and Givenchy for my dress and most specially thank you my make-up artist na siya ring make-up artist sa bagong horror movie na CINCO please watch.

Office Clash of 2010 (draft)

Kung may Teen Clash of 2010 ang PBB, may Office Classh din ang CMSC (ComSci). Oh di ba!!

In your own opinion, aling office suite ang pinaka-”THE BEST”?

a. Microsoft Office

b. Open Office

Image Source

Sa unang kita ko ng computer which was noong Grade 4 ako,at sa pagkamulat ng aking isipan na pwede pa lang bumili at magmay-ari ng isang computer which was noong Grade 6, Microsoft Office lang talaga ang ginamit ko when typing documents and preparing presentations. By the way, Grade 6 ko lang talaga nalaman na pwede pa lang magkaroon ng computer sa bahay kasi akala ko na sa paaralan at mga business establishments lang iyan makikita. Nalaman ko na pwede pa lang bumili ng isa dahil nagulat talaga ako na mayroon ng computer ang aming kapitbahay, aba akalain mo at na-”outshine” ako.  Pero back to the CLASH, solid Microsoft Office user talaga ako, hanggang sa pumunta ako internet cafe noong first year high school ako at sinabihan ko yung in-charge na “Ate! asa ko pwede musuwat sa computer?(chars..suwatan lageh ang computer)” and mabuti at hindi naman “PHILOSOPHY” iyong in-charge sa internet cafe kaya sinabihan lang niya ako ng “Abliha lang ng Opin Opis dong adto sa start nga button!(overss..mu-knock-knock pa teh? ablihan man kaha?)”. And there it is, ang akung first encounter sa Open Office , isn’t it remarkable?

Microsoft Office

Open Office

Well, based on our Lab Activity which was to use Open Office Impress which is the counterpart of Microsoft Office PowerPoint, I can say that I really did had a hard time designing and adjusting sizes of text boxes and some other stuff. Well, lets face the fact that it was my first time using Open Office Impress but lets put into the situation that it would also be my first time using PowerPoint, I still do believe that PowerPoint is would be more user friendly because it is easy to explore and has nice design and it has a greater feel of technological innovation.

On the second activity which was to use Open Office Calc, well it was a lot the same with Microsoft Office Excel as based on its “looks” well I don’t actually know how to compare these two because for me they’re just the same. But while I was exploring Impress i was really impressed when i pressed the butoon “fx” or function then a dialog blox opened and it has greater ease on choosing functions rather than Microsoft Office. Indeed I am a little bit amazed with Impress rather than Excel.

At sa ngayon, may One point each na ang dalawang office suites. Saan nga ba talaga ako kakampi? sa Open Office na bago ko pa lang nakita o sa Microsoft Office na aking minahal noon at magpakailanman(bias!!)

Ikaw? choose na!! NOW na!!! but honestly, huwag na nga lang nating ikumpara ang dalawa kung pwede namang i-combine gaya ng Voltes V na video ni Sir Chito.

BONGGA!!

Kung may sagot na kayo sa aking unang tanong, ay tatanungin ko kayo ulit gaya sa bagong portion sa NNNN ang “Instant Tanong, Instant Sagot, LAGOT!!”. So the question goes like this:

Kung sakaling mag-merge and dalawang office suites, ano ang karapat dapat na pangalan sa bagong program?

A. OpenSoft Office

B. MicroOpen Office

C. Ayaw na lang i-merge kay hasul na!

D. All of the below.(para something new na phud ba kay kapoy kaayo ang “all of the above” kay muhangad pa ta! duhr)

Just type Office <space> letter of your answer and send it gamit ang telegrama sa panahon pa sa lola sa imung lolo nga si Tinong’s nga tiyo ni Julie’s nga mama ni French Baker. Tan-awun natu kung maka-reply ba ka! Overs!

Visaya-English Dictionary

ayaw pag-think ug anything BASTOS ani nga note kay ang purpose ani niya kay para makabalo tah sa mga things nga usahay ra jhud natuh ma-learn or madunggan. kani inyung mabasahan kay ang mga bisaya nga transalation sa some unusual words.

Vagina – kanal o lungag sa buto o bilat nga mosangko ngadto sa tagoangkan.

Tagoangkan – uterus.

Scrotum – putos sa mga itlog sa tawo o mananap; lagay.

Labia Majora – Mga pilo sa panit nga anaa sa gawas nga naglibot sa lungag sa buto; ngabil sa buto.

Labia Minora – Mga pilo sa tehido nga anaa sa sulod nga naglibot sa lungag sa buto; wait sa buto.

Horny – bigaon; uwagon; makihiliwasnon; mahinamo sa pakighilawas.

Prostitute – puta; pampam; burikat.

Fuck – habal; takmang; upa.

Sexual Intercourse – pakighilawas tali sa duha ka tawo diin ang utog nga utin ipasulod sa buto alang sa pagapagula sa binhi sa makahiliwasnong katigbaw.